Complete and Utter Despair
by fictionrulesmylife97
Summary: 2x23 Spec Fic. Olicity. A little one shot on how the season 2 finale could go. Based on the preview pics for 2x23 where Slade has Felicity.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Arrow, or any of the characters involved in this fic.**

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When the silhouette finally appeared in the doorway, the relief in the entourage awaiting them was palpable. The League of Assassins stood to attention, the Suicide Squad relaxed slightly, and lowered their weapons. Thea removed her head from Roy's chest to peer at the smokey haze in front of them, and Lyla removed her hand from Diggles, the only barrier that had stopped him from charging forward, even though Slades orders had been specific, and without loophole. _Come alone or she dies_. Oliver wouldn't let them risk backup, her life was too important.

Laurel gave a cry and and attempted to run forward but Sara and Lance stopped her. Both were staring straight at the silhouette, which showed Oliver carrying Felicity.

But he wasn't carrying Felicity; he was carrying her body.

Laurel stepped back again as Diggle sprinted forward and Roy hid his face in Thea's hair. Because Felicity was gone, you could see it, clear as day on Oliver's face.

_Complete and utter despair._

He made it to 10 metres from them when Diggle met him, and Oliver collapsed to the ground on his knees. Diggle dropped down next to him, and a select few others made their way forward. Sara, Lyla, Lance, Thea, Roy, Laurel. They surrounded the three.

Diggle had his hand on Felicity's head, his own bowed with grief as his shoulders shook, and Lyla stepped forward and crouched next to him, and arm around him as she stared down sadly at the blonde, her hair was out of its tie, her face almost peaceful, the blood could be seen clearly on her top, and on Oliver's suit.

But it was Oliver in general that was the worst. He was staring down at Felicity, looking exactly like expected, like his world had fallen apart. He didn't even seem to notice the others that surrounded him. He just sat there, staring at Felicity, his eyes wide, his mask was gone, hood still up, but anyone who saw him would know instantly. He was utterly defeated.

Slowly, Oliver lifted his hand, which had still lay beneath Felicity's knees, and pulled it up to her face. It was shaking with his emotions, as he gently placed his hand on her face. A sob was heard somewhere, but he didn't look up, just at the face in front of him. Oliver leant forward and pressed his forehead against hers. A shuddered breath left his lungs, and it all became too much.

With an agonised cry - that Oliver, in all his 6 years of hell, had never released - he pulled Felicity up and into his chest, rocking back and forth as sobs rocked his body. His hold on her was so unbelievably tight, but he just clung tighter, hoping his body heat would spread into her, and remove the cold, and bring her back.

_Back to him._

"Why?" A shaky voice asked, and Oliver knew it was Thea, her voice slightly muffled by Roy's chest. Both were crying, in fact, everyone surrounding them was crying, Lance included. But Lance kept his eyes on Oliver, because it was finally clicking together, he was finally understanding who the Arrow was, and why he did what he did.

It was Sara who answered, clinging onto her father and sister, her voice shaking in grief.

"He killed the person he loves the most."

The words caused everyone in the vicinity to stare at Oliver, the Arrow, the Vigilante. Because, never, not even Malcolm Merlyn, who was staring with such sympathy it surprised even himself, had any of them seen him look so weak, so destroyed.

Sara's words caused Oliver to cry harder, pressing his head into Felicity's neck, trying to keep her with him.

"But, why, why is she-?" Thea cut herself off with a gasp, before looking at the man on the ground in front of her. She knew he had heard her, but he didn't respond, didn't even tilt his head. He didn't move.

Thea stepped forward, shaking her hand from Roy's when he tried to hold her back with an angry and wavery "No!". She walked forward until she was next to the man with the hood. She lay a hand on Felicity's leg, and only then did he look up, not at her, but at her hand. And Thea used this to her advantage, with a shaking hand, she placed her other hand on the hood covering the Arrow's face.

"Thea…" Roy's voice cracked as he spoke, he was worn out after everything that had happened, but he needed to warn her.

But she didn't let that happen, in one fluid motion, she shoved the hood back, revealing the face of her older brother, who didn't even look at her.

"Ollie." Thea whispered. You could see Lance stiffen as he finally got his confirmation, but he didn't say anything. Neither did Thea, because no matter how angry, and hurt, and betrayed she felt, she understood finally.

_I was just trying to keep you safe._

Because here was confirmation in front of her, of why her brother lied, why Roy broke up with her, and why, no matter how obvious it was to her, her brother had never pursued his EA.

"Oh, Ollie…" Thea wrapped her arms around Oliver's neck and placed her head on his shoulder, hugging him tightly. But besides lowering Felicity's body into his lap slightly, he showed no response to her touch. In the 5 minutes since he came out of the building, his eyes had not left Felicity's slim frame.

They stayed there for another few minutes, Diggle, who had excused himself for a moment, came back, and once again knelt down besides them, placing a hand on Felicity's shoulder. Finally, Oliver spoke.

"I should have known." He whispered, his voice was cracked, like he'd been shouting desperately for hours, which, people realised, he probably had. "I should have known… how could I not… realise… that he'd figure it out. I told her… that he had taken everything already… he hadn't even begun… she knew… that he'd come for her… she gave him the cure… but it was too.. t-too la-ate… she's gone… and it's my fault… I tried… so… hard to keep her safe… I failed… she believed in me… and I failed." Oliver broke off with another cry and Thea moved back as he once again pulled Felicity up to his chest, when before, he had been whispering, he now shouted.

"No! No, no no! Please! Ple-ase! Felicity! Please! Don't leave me! I'm so sorry, so sorry! Please! I love you, I'm sorry! No! Don't leave me! No…" His voice dropped to a whisper again as he kissed her forehead. "I love you, I love you so much. I'm so sorry, Felicity, I'm sorry."

Oliver's voice cracked again and he slowly stood up. Placing Felicity on the ground Oliver stepped back a few steps, his eyes wide, wild with a grief only Malcolm Merlyn understood. And that's why he chose that moment to lunge forward and grab Oliver's arm just before he ran. Ran never to return, because how could he when she was gone. Turner and Lawton also ran forward, and grabbed a hold of Oliver as he began to rampage. He was screaming, like nothing they'd ever seen. Even Diggle wasn't prepared for this.

"Oliver! You can't go! Do you think this is what she'd want? You can't run away this time! A.R.G.U.S. may not be a problem any more, but we have plenty to do. You can't leave her memory like this!" Diggle's voice cracked as he spoke, and he was standing directly in front of Oliver.

"No! She's gone Diggle! It's my fault! My fault she's dead! Why! Why do I deserve _anything_ when she's dead because of me."

"Because this isn't your fault, man. Felicity… she made her own choices, she knew this would happen, and she managed to defeat Slade with the cure. Now he's gone and you don't have to-"

A phone ringing cut Diggle off and everyone froze. Because anyone who would call in this situation was present. Detective Lance slowly reached into his pocket and pulled out a phone. When he looked at the screen his face contorted in fury as he jabbed the answer button and pulled it up to his ear.

"You psychotic bastard! When I find you, I swear I'll kill you! You don't have any superstre-"

Suddenly Lance's face grew pale and his eyes flew to Felicity's body, where Sara, Thea and Roy now surrounded. Laurel stood a respectable distance, next to her father.

"That's not possible, I can see her right now, she-"

Again, Lance was cut off, and his eyes grew wide. Oliver stopped struggling, and stood staring at Lance, it was one of the only times he'd removed his eyes from Felicity's still form. Diggle stepped forward and Lance realised what they were asking, he placed the phone on loud speaker and the reaction was instantaneous as Slade's voice spoke. Most people stiffened, and Merlyn, Lawton and Turner grabbed him again before he charged at a phone, and put an arrow in it.

"-came in the room, I gave her mirakuru. She metabolised the effects quickly, I may have killed her but the mirakuru has kept her alive, she'll wake shortly. Tell Oliver that… that I'm sorry, I… there's nothing I can say, but he'll never see me again. Goodbye."

Everyone was frozen, shock in every form, and slowly people's eyes moved to Felicity.

Sara was the first to come around, she jolted and ripped away Felicity's coat, tearing the shirt to show Felicity's chest, where there should be a stab wound from Slade's sword.

But there wasn't.

Oliver wrenched himself from the men's grasps and ran forward, dropping to his knees in front of Felicity. He placed his hand on her neck and eagerly, greedily, felt for a pulse point.

He found it.

His breath caught in his throat as he looked up at Diggle.

"She's alive… she's alive… I can feel it, she's alive John!" And that was when Oliver Queen smiled so bright that everyone present, who had all lost loved ones, couldn't help but realise that this wasn't the end. Oliver laughed, once, and everyone stared as he pulled Felicity once again into his lap and kissed her forehead.

It was 10 minutes later when she finally stirred, The League of Assasins and the Suicide Squad had left, all with goodbyes. Sara and Nyssa promised to see each other shortly, Lyla kissed Diggle goodbye and Diggle shook the men's hands, Lawton included. And Malcolm and Thea had a very complicated goodbye, with him telling her he'd leave, but when she was in trouble, he'd be there in an instant.

That was the only time Oliver's mind turned off Felicity, well, almost, at least enough to threaten to kill Malcolm and ask how he was alive. But Oliver couldn't argue with him when he promised Thea he'd be there if she was in trouble. Because after today, he knew that he would never not accept help again.

While they waited, Oliver finally filled them in. How he found Slade and Felicity, how he fought Slade, before Slade had Felicity by the neck. How he yelled at him, that he couldn't hide his feelings. And that was when Slade told him.

_Tell her, tell her how you feel, Oliver Queen, or she dies right here._

Logically, Oliver should have realised that telling her couldn't have saved her. But he did anyway, he looked her in the eye, and let out a shaking breath. Before he spoke.

"I love you, Felicity."

And Felicity had stood there, so calmly, and she didn't say anything, as Slade continued his rampage, and Oliver shouted at Slade to please not do this, Felicity pulled something out of her pocket – a needle – and managed to turn in Slades arms.

It all happened at the same time.

Oliver screamed at Slade to let her go, all pretenses gone as his eyes welled up with tears.

Felicity turned in Slade's arms and jabbed the cure into his neck.

And Slade drove his sword through Felicity's chest.

Oliver didn't notice Slade stumbling away, he was only aware of Felicity in his arms as her eyes closed, and her body grew cold, and he sobbed over her. It took him a long time to find the strength to pick Felicity up, and take her outside. Where his entire life did a 720 twist.

When Felicity came to, she was still laying in Oliver's arms, Diggle was on the other side of her head, smiling brightly, while Roy and Sara knelt by her legs. Lance and Laurel stood over them, to the side, with Thea beside them.

"Hey blondie, how you feeling?" Roy was the first to ask, and he ignored the look Oliver sent him.

"Felicity." He whispered, his face inches from hers as he looked down at her intently, scrutinizing her as she lay there.

"Oliver?" Her voice was cracked and rough, but the moment she spoke everyone grinned. "What happened? How did we get here?"

Oliver's grin faded as he looked down at her, "you don't remember?"

"No, what happened?"

"Slade killed you, Felicity." He didn't mean to say it, it just slipped out, but he saw the effect it had as Felicity flinched and her eyes widened.

"But, how, how am I alive?"

He injected you with mirakuru," Oliver explained, brushing hair away from her forehead, "but don't worry, we have the cure, we can get rid of it."

Felicity's brow crinkled as she thought and Oliver's heart skipped a beat as he watched her. So beautiful, so alive.

"I don't remember." She said, and everyone stiffened, slowly, Sara leant forward, throwing a glance at Oliver, before speaking.

"What do you remember?"

"I remember, waiting in the clocktower, while Diggle, Oliver and Roy went to meet you Lance's, and then nothing."

Oliver froze, she didn't remember, she didn't remember him confessing his love for her, she didn't remember injecting Slade, or dying, or Oliver crying over her as she took her last breaths. He took a deep breath, before looking up and away, avoiding the concerned eyes of everyone around him as he stared out onto the horizon, dawn was breaking, the city still burned, but the danger was past.

Now he had a decision, to tell her, or not to.

"Oliver? Are you okay?" Felicity's voice brought him back and he looked down at her. She was watching him, concern evident, and he smiled at her, even as he felt his heart break.

"Yeah, I'm fine, just tired, we should get you home, you need rest, and we'll give you the cure."

"What happened?" She asked, and everyone turned their eyes to Oliver, waiting, Diggle, who had been watching Felicity like she was a Christmas Miracle for some time, even looked up and gave him a 'don't even think about it' glare.

But Oliver ignored him.

"We won, you defeated Slade, Felicity, you saved us all. You injected him with the cure. It's over."

Felicity still looked confused, but she nodded, before trying to stand up. Oliver and Diggle helped her up and they stared out onto the horizon.

Before long, Felicity was making her way over to an abandoned car, Diggle helping her as he sent a disapproving glare back at Oliver, Thea and Roy stuck around, telling Oliver that he could come home with them, and the Lances left to, not without there own exasperated looks. Sara shook her head at him and Laurel smiled sadly, but it was Quentin who spoke. He walked up besides Oliver and clapped him on the back as they watched Felicity's retreating form.

"You're an idiot, you know that, Queen?"

"She's safer like this, I can't hurt her, and they can't hurt her. At least now, that I know, I can keep her safe. She deserves better."

Quentin looked at him and gave him a sad look almost identical to his daughters.

"You're half right, she deserves the best. And you deserve eachother."

And with that, Quentin trailed after his daughters, as Oliver followed Roy and Thea home.


End file.
